Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Sex = tells a mans body that he is doing good job, the so called ultimate compliment. Just looking at a beautiful woman makes me want to kill myself sometimes. Its deep ridden pain of my sexuality as a man making me want to do something to get laid, and that the things I am doing now, the thoughts I am having are not getting me laid, so it makes me feel extreme pain and dissatisfaction to motivate me to go out there and do whatever it takes to receive the ultimate compliment from a woman whose compliment I'd deem as worthy ( not slut )

Its kind of funny how important it is.

Imagine if no matter what you do in life, everything feels wrong, not because YOU think its wrong, but only because you are not having sex. STUPID AS FUCK

And imagine that no matter how bad you are doing, and how wrong you are, you don't feel like it matters, because you are getting laid.

That is male sexuality

Its painful to go against your own senses, it sure is great empowerment not to have to do that, but what options are there. I am not going to steep myself down

"I don't have a girlfriend, I have tinder" heard this quote today from a class mate. Sigh

I wish there was easier way to deal with natural animal feelings, kind of tiring to have to masturbate 5 times a day to make myself IMMUNE to attraction

Sometimes it makes me mad that women without doing anything can influence and have so much power of my feelings, that is of course if I do nothing about it...

Well I am just sulking because I am tired and horny. I feel like I want to just burn through it all without giving a slightest fuck about sexuality. But that is naive and childish, or maybe I can develop strong enough conviction, make myself immune to it all by developing my mind. Make sexuality my constant daily challenge, a foe always in wait, in wait to strike at me in any moment. It would give me another chance to stare right myself in the eyes as I face strong feelings.

I like these extreme emotions in me, sure its not pleasant, but at least I feel alive

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