Tuesday, August 9, 2016

123123crowowo reporting in123123123

It is important to know what do you feel exactly.
It is important to know how to deal with those feelings

Without that knowledge everything what happens in your life may or may not be understood for what it actually is, hence you will end up doing bad decisions and hurting yourself for no reason ( not useful kind of hurt )

There are few major things which keep me down in my current life and have kept me down up until now. It took me a while to narrow it down, but its really simple stuff in the end

my negatives: lack of love/lonely, lack of purpose/motivation/CONFUSED about what to do ( causes stress, anxiety, amplifies loneliness )

These feelings, these negatives came in different shapes in my life:
  1. being confused in games, trying to find myself in them
  2. having weird, unclear ideas on relationships, love , sex 
  3. being a rebel and ruining things, just for the sake of finding my thing
  4. isolating myself
  5. looking for other "weirdos" to connect with
  6. failing to find anything i was looking for, because it is not there in the first place = making myself feel only worse, and suicidal every day
Yeah something like that. Honestly im not super inspired as im writing this, im just too lazy to go to the shop and move on with my day, so im writing down the last bit of my thoughts ~~

What matters to me is to feel appreciated and loved. It doesn't have to come from anybody though. 
To be loved, is not to AIM to be loved. It is simply to feel loved, that is all it is. First step is to allow yourself to feel those things. When you think that someone has to be there for you and express warm feelings towards you for you to feel love, you block those feelings off when they are not. You become dependent on another person to open those gates you've set up. That is not right way. All the best things come from within, that is generally the universal law of how things go. Nobody can MAKE you feel anything, your body is the receptor of everything what happens, so naturally you must ALLOW things to be felt, you are the gate.

Another thing which matters to me is purpose, knowing what to dedicate my energy on, belief. It is again a rather similar thing. You must allow yourself to believe that what you are doing is the right thing. But to honestly do that, it requires focus and attention and consistent updating and reviews on the thing that you are actually doing. Or at least once in a while. I guess a romantic way to describe that would be : " Listen to whats going on " or even more vaguely haha" Hear yourself "

Allow yourself the things you seek, as it is impossible to find, unless you allow your body to feel it and sense it

Give yourself time off and listen to yourself.

Those are the good ways to sustain your personal growth. They are so broad and indirect, that its basically impossible to go wrong with them

old vid

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