Being a beautiful human being
What does it mean, how is it done, and why should it be done?
Is it selflessness, is it self sacrifice
Is it honesty and being open
Is it physical appearance
Is it a combination of it all
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Purity, warmth? What expresesses the most beauty. What is the definition of beauty to me?
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IDEAS FROM INTERNET:
Empathy:
"It’s about understanding them so deeply that their happiness becomes your happiness, and their pain becomes your pain."
They listen intently with their ears and their eyes. They make you feel heard and understood.
They are humble. They don’t seek recognition. Whatever they do comes from their heart.
But those with truly beautiful souls see the beauty in this transience. They live more fully, love more deeply, and appreciate more sincerely because they know that every moment is temporary.
“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”
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Empathy.. Its much more intense than prevviously imagined. To feel someones happiness, to feel someones pain, you must enter their state fully. Not the idea, not the shallow, easily-accessible/on top feeling, but the whole thing. Being fully present and immersed. Live through their eyes, feel through their eyes. Complete and absolute focus
If that is not done, I don't know how else it can be felt. Fraction of it maybe, but that won't be a true one, and it leaves room for corruption. Personal pains, personal triggers, personal interpretations that can really hurt the other. Lose focus for a bit as a person is opening up to you about things that cause them great emotions, and you've just increased chances of hurting them
I struggle with it. I get lost in my own things sometimes. Sometimes it even seems "fair" to let myself wallow in my own world for a bit, as no one is paying attention to me or mine (or that is the assumption)
But that idea itself, makes any person who does care for you, hurt. You just pushed them away, trashed their care for not being enough, shame them. Its so disgusting...
How can I overcome this though? Do I need to just believe that I am lowed and cared for? Base it all on that confidence and make it unshakeable?
That is the bravery that is needed I guess? Bravery to just assume unknown to be true, and trust it. Operate from that center point. Choose to call something home, to trust, to open up
Viewed through the perspective of care, everything aligns itself warmly. The way you speak, the way you feel, feeling empathy becomes easier too, as you are not losing focus by some personal triggers. Actually paying attention.
I have no reason not to trust, I want to trust. Its just unusual, scary, undefined. How to even trust?
It takes practice. But I want to try. My intuition tells me its the right path to take to being a full human being, and hey I want that.
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"Don't apologize, just do better/be better"
Goes with the thoughts above. How to trust again? How does a person who trusts another even feel like and act like?
Anything else holding me back from feeling it? Same thing is for the other person too, most likely. Its a struggle for you both, perhaps it can be more open as well
(feeling unable to feel, having difficulty trusting and opening up, not being sure on wtf is going on on the inside LOL, having hard time saying I love you and believing those words, believing it from other people and so on...)
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That one time driving from bialsko biala to bialystok in kuken. Decided to just take off my shackles, to just feel the present. That felt so liberating. All I could feel was tingle, ticklish, funny feeling. Perhaps love? For the car, for the ride, for the company. It felt so warm and fun. I loved being like that, it felt like me
While the first half ot the trip I was stressed out, worried. Work, human relation problems and personal psychological and physical fears and anxieties (am I even capable of relaxing, loving, feeling, sex, work and make money, support, survive?). But eventually chose to just give up all of that, be present. Because godknows a person besides me, is struggling to be as present as possible as well. Why make it harder for her? Lets fucking go
In many ways shes been a big inspiration to ground myself, to prevent myself from drowning in self delusions which seem right. Its not done "for her", its done inspired by her. Theres a difference in that
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My "honest communication" is just digging myself into a hole, shutting others away. Crying about it
Wtf is that?
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